Law of Attraction: Needing vs. Wanting

The law of attraction is the basic rule governing this universe. The rule says that your focus determines your reality. Many think that it is as easy as thinking positive thoughts all the time. But there is more to the law of attraction than just focusing positively. This article focuses on the very important difference between wanting and needing.

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If you are not familiar with the Law of Attraction, read the article on Law of Attraction- The Basic Understanding or watch the Youtube video on the Law of Attraction.

When applying the Law of attraction in your life it is crucial to understand the difference between manifesting from a place of needing and manifesting from a place of wanting something. While needing implies some sort of lack, wanting is a pure desire which enforces an expansion. Let’s look deeper into both.

Needing Implies Lack

Most people start out manifesting from a place of need. “I need more money”, “I need love”, “I need a house” are examples of desires coming from a place of need. For every need, you have there has to be a lack thereof on the other side. For example, if you need more money, that means you lack money. If you need love, that means you lack love. If you need a house, that means you lack a shelter. And your core motivation for manifesting is to get out of a state of lack. This motivation then creates the vibration of lack.
Living in a vibration based universe, where everything responds to your vibration and like attracts like, the vibration of lack attracts more lack. In the case of needing something, it doesn’t really matter how much you focus positively on money or love, if you want something because you think you lack it, you will attract more lack thereof.

Wanting Implies Expansion

Wanting on the other side comes from a place of expansion and desiring more of what you already have. “I want more money because I want to create more amazing experiences in my life” or “I want love because I want to share intimacy”. In these examples it’s not that you are lacking something, you are just ready to create a new experience for yourself. In the statement “I want love because I want to share intimacy” it’s clear that the person has intimacy within themselves and the person simply wants to start sharing it. And in the statement of “I want more money because I want to create more amazing experiences in my life” it’s very clear that the person already has money and simply wants to create more money to create more amazing experiences. Both of these are desires to expand and not desires to get away from something or to fill a void.  They both also come with embracing their current state of being by simply saying “I want more of..”.
The wanting creates a vibration of having and the focus on having creates more having. So manifesting more of what you have creates more of what you have.

Difference Between Wanting and Needing Explained

To know whether you manifest from a place of need or want, take a look at your motivations behind your manifestations. Are you motivated to manifest something just for the fun, joy, and excitement of seeing that creation in existence? Or are you motivated because you are in some sort of pain that you want to manifest yourself out of? To clarify that, you can ask yourself these questions:

  1. Why do I want to manifest that thing?
  2. What will happen if I don’t manifest that thing? How will I feel? What will I think?

Question No.1 will give you clarity into the way you feel without the manifestation. If the answer is any kind of feeling that implies lack, you are coming from a place of need and so will that be what you attract.

What to Do About your Neediness

After understanding the difference between wanting and needing , it is important to not simply lie and trick yourself into believing that you manifest from a place of wanting. This will not work and it will cause you a lot of disappointment because you will still attract the lack. Even if you trick yourself into thinking that you manifest from a place of wanting, you still have a vibration of lack. Because you can lie to yourself but your vibration does not lie.

So instead of lying or manipulating yourself, start to deal with your lack directly and resolve it. To do that, here are 5 steps.

1. Understand That There is No Lack

You are born whole. Everything you want and need is accessible to you. You never lack anything because you have the ability as a creator to create everything you want. And creating does not mean that you are creating out of nothing and you are creating what has never been there. Instead, creating is more like shifting into other realities where your desires do already exist. And shifting does not imply that something is not there. Shifting into another reality means that all realities where your already been manifested exist. And you have the power to choose based on preference which reality you want to experience. Like a radio you  are able to tune in to different frequencies. And tuning in to one frequency does not mean that all other frequencies do not exist.
So there is never a lack of something. Only the current reality you choose makes it appear as though there is lack. But you choose this lack with your vibration. And this does not mean that your current lack reality is the ultimate truth of this universe. It’s just your experience in this one  reality where you created the illusion of lack.

2. Don’t Beat Yourself Up

Knowing the previous point and seeing how you are the creator of your lack does not make you a bad person. Also, it does not mean that you should beat yourself up for that and that you are such a bad spiritual person because you are holding these lack vibrations.
Instead, know that coming from a place of lack has a purpose. You are here to expand and expansion happens through desire. And desire happens through polarities. So having the experience of lack helps you to desire the contrary. So your experience of lack has the purpose of reminding you that there is no lack.

3. Accept Where you’re At

Embrace and accept where you’re at. Instead of trying to manifest yourself out of your current reality, look for the positive aspects. Look for ways this current reality is helping and serving you. Finding the positive in a reality or situation you want to escape helps you to accept and embrace it. On top of that by embracing your current situation, you open yourself up to receiving information and clarity about your path and why you are here.
To help you do that, answer the following questions as detailed as possible:

  1. How is this situation/ reality that I am trying to escape serving me?
  2. What is positive about my current situation?
  3. What may be a learning that I take from this experience?

Answering these questions help you to accept where you’re at which then helps you to have a vibration of acceptance instead of lack.

4. Difference Between Wanting and Needing: Be Radical

Now that you have some little acceptance for your situation, take that acceptance one step further by doing a little exercise. This exercise is one of my favorite exercises and it is very powerful and helpful to radically accept your current situation.
Look at your current situation or reality and ask yourself:

  1. If I’ll stay here for the rest of my life, never change, never move and always staying the same, how can I make peace with my current situation?
  2. How would I treat myself and my environment if I knew that I and my environment will never ever change?

These questions are amazing to start radically accepting your situation. Try to really think and feel the questions and the answers coming up. Most of the time the answers will not be mental answers in form of thought. Often the answers will be feeling states or shift in your way of thinking.

5. Surrender your Needs

An important step to stop manifesting from a place of need and to use the difference between wanting and needing to your advantage is to surrender all the needs you have. Surrendering means to let go of all the pain that is coming with the feeling and thought of lacking and therefore needing something. That means if you want to manifest money because you lack it, fully surrender the feeling of not having money. Feel the pain, the restriction and the worry coming. If you want to manifest love, because you lack companion and caring, fully feel and surrender the feelings of loneliness and lack of love. Feel every negative emotion that comes with your feeling of lack until you feel a sense of relief.
To help you with that process, read the following articles:

How to Let go- The Only Technique You Will Ever Need

Negative Thoughts- How to Stop Recurring Negative Thoughts


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